Me on ‘Pink Day’ at work in 2010.
On Monday I have my hospital appointment. I am literally counting the hours down. I was so lucky that my appointment could be made within two weeks. It can take three to four weeks for the initial appointment and I can’t imagine how it would feel to continue wondering for that long. There ups and downs to having the NHS. It’s free (which is the upside) but it can be a postcode lottery to see how your care is handled – some places don’t offer certain medications and some do. All a lottery. So far, it looks like my postcode has done well. Also, the hospitals in my area are good, the three closest have good reputations and are easy to get to. (Can you tell that I have thought a fair deal about all of this?)
The last two weeks have actually gone by quite quickly. I have had some tears and my head has been full of thoughts on how I would tell people, and what systems I would need to put in place financially if I was to be off work for any length of time. And then I realised that I was getting way ahead of myself. This could all be nothing, and by Monday afternoon I might be happily sitting back at my desk typing away and shouting to the world that there was nothing to worry about. Another upside is that the results should be in on the same day.
I also realised that whilst only a few friends know, I had put it out on the blog for anyone to read. It’s weird. I suppose that there is always a distance with blogging. No matter how close we feel to someone whose blog we read (and I feel very close to some of the people whose blogs I read) I have never met one reader of my blog who wasn’t already a friend and so if I feel rubbish one day or a bit sad I don’t have people saying ‘Are you okay?’ and that is a lovely feeling. Sometimes the distance can be pretty comforting.
That said, if the news is bad, then I will expect everyone to send me virtual soup and love and best wishes (and I am certain that you would all come through for me with that)!
I have three more days to keep myself busy. I’m out with the girls tonight, walking to Harrods with mum (7 miles) for breakfast and then to the Origins counter for products (nothing like a good dose of stress to have my skin do unkind things) and then baking and gardening and watching football. Oh and as my boss is out today, her office is going to be fully sorted out (I’ve done my desk drawers twice already).
Have a good weekend. By Monday evening I will have posted my results for you all to see. Please hope that they are all okay.